72% OF KMFDM FANS STILL THINK NAME MEANS “KILL MOTHER-FUCKING DEPECHE MODE
Depeche Mode respond with a polite statement: “We do not remember asking to be murdered.”
Latest
“Smells Like My Arse”: Chris Martin Finds His Base Notes in the Back End
Chris Martin responds to ex-wife Gwyneth Paltrow's "Smells Like My Vagina" candle with his own "Smells Like My Arse"
MUSK UNVEILS ROBOCOCK, OFFERS HORSES TO THE MASSES
Elon Musk—lover, rocket man, alleged horse baron—has once again launched himself into the headlines genitals-first. While Tesla stock yo-yos and his children’s names start to resemble CAPTCHA codes, the Model D promises a future where men can literally fuck machines—and possibly sue them afterward.
TRUMP’S TRUTH FUMES TRIGGER LAWSUIT: AIDE CLAIMS HE DEVELOPED EMPHYSEMA FROM INHALING PRESIDENT’S BULLSHIT
Trump Aide files suit after claims breathing the President's Bullshit gave him emphysema.
SUMMIT HAILED AS SUCCESS; TRUMP LEAVES JAPAN WITH SACRED PUTTER, NOBEL NOD
A "masterclass in targeted adulation," The Sycophantic Presidential Golden Shower.
Recipe For Disaster
Take one dictatorship posing as a democracy
Slow roast until the heart is black and the meat is thirsty
Add two or three cracked liberalists
Whisk together with million dollar missiles
Pour in a few hundred thousand dead soldiers
And a good pinch of murdered women and children
Let it
White House Press Sec's 'Your Mom Did' Threatens World Order; Budapest Summit Now Contingent on Parental Approval
Due to the "Your Mom" remark, officials are now seeking to get parental confirmation for all upcoming Trump-y shit shows.