Kent Seaside Residents Rejoice as Cyclone Changes Course for Pas-Ici-sur-Mer

Residents call it ‘the best weather we’ve never had.’

What began as Hurricane Corinne in the mid-Atlantic made landfall as a historic post-tropical cyclone on the French coastal town of Pas-Ici-sur-Mer. The system, which forecasters noted had retained an "almost insolent" degree of strength for its journey across the North Atlantic, had been expected to strike the Kent coast but altered course shortly before dawn. Residents of Pett-Neville were cheering and rejoicing as scenes of destruction flooded news channels. The storm made landfall instead in the French resort town of Pas-Ici-sur-Mer — a place, locals here are quick to point out, “we are absolutely not twinned with.”

By mid-morning, Pett-Neville’s high street was festooned with impromptu bunting. At The Dripping Gull pub, landlord Pluggy Smeeton poured celebratory halves of bitter beneath a hand-lettered sign reading “Better Them Than Us-fest ’25.” Patrons raised glasses each time new footage arrived of toppled beach huts on the opposite shore. A sweepstake was started on the cost of the French clear-up operation, with the prize being a commemorative "I Didn't Get Wet" tea towel.

“It’s a tragedy for them, obviously,” Mr Smeeton told our reporter, grinning. “But what a relief for us! And let’s be honest, they’d be doing the same if the boot was on the other foot. Probably with more shrugging.”

Pett-Neville’s Town Council released a statement expressing "sincere and profound relief." Councillor Brenda Thwaites announced plans for a commemorative bench on the seafront, to be inscribed: ‘Better Them Than Us.’

Across the Channel, Pas-Ici-sur-Mer reported extensive structural damage. The town’s sardine cooperative was destroyed and large sections of the promenade were lost to the sea. The annual Festival du Presque-Rien has been postponed. Power and water supplies are disrupted.

Mayor Étienne Dubitatif appeared outside the ruined Hôtel de Ville to deliver what observers called his “most optimistic shrug yet.”

“Pas-Ici-sur-Mer has survived worse,” he said, gesturing to the collapsed sea wall. “To be honest, much of the town looks the same, only some bits are now upside down. C’est la vie maritime.”

He promised a full reconstruction “once the paperwork dries,” and noted the destruction of several municipal buildings would “significantly streamline bureaucracy for the foreseeable future.”

Satellite images later confirmed that Pas-Ici’s port had been left resembling “a well-stirred bouillabaisse.” Despite this, residents interviewed by local French television appeared almost serene. The spirit of pragmatic acceptance was widespread. Jean-Luc Pamplemousse, owner of the fromagerie ‘La Vache Qui Pleure’, was found rescuing wheels of Camembert from the harbour.

"The sea salt has given them... a certain je ne sais quoi," he mused, tapping a brine-soaked cheese. "We will call this new vintage Le Déluge. It will be expensive."

Down the road, in the flooded Place de la République, two men were attempting a game of pétanque. "The water displacement adds an element of chaos theory," one explained, as his boule sank without a trace. "It is more honest this way." Another fisherman, ankle-deep in debris, simply told reporters:

“We are lucky people. Disaster chooses us often, so we have good manners for it.”

As night fell, Pett-Neville’s church bells rang a spontaneous peal of gratitude while a handful of residents gathered on the cliffs to wave ironically toward the dark horizon. Roast beef sandwiches were served alongside bread and dripping.